Weekend Update

My mom, sister-in-law, and nieces stayed at our house on Saturday. We ate at Cafe' Rio (a mandatory stop for my Pocatello family) and then went to Wheeler Park. Its a really cool farm/park a block from our apartment. Then we left Thurm to go biking with his cousin, and we went to Gardener Village to shop. I didn't realize I left my keys at home because we were driving Florecita's car. When we got back, we were locked out for about an hour. Thurm finally rode up and informed us that there was a key under the mat : (
I don't think I've mentioned that I was called to Primary Chorister. I was called more than a month ago, but yesterday was my first time. The old chorister was having a hard time letting go and told me I could just watch and "train." Which turned out to be nice to see how things are run in primary. I haven't been in primary since I was 11, so it was a little foggy. I was pretty nervous, not because of the kids, but because of the teachers staring me down. I didn't know the songs, so I fumbled through a few and managed to do a decent job for my first time.

Everyone keeps asking Thurm and I what we do for fun and I always blank because we don't do anything notable. I think people ask us that because we don't have a TV. And I think they ask us that because we don't talk about our lives that much. So being the Research Assistant that I am, I wondered, "how do other people spend their time?", and I found what the US Census had to say about it:

"On an average day in 2005, nearly everyone (96 percent) age 15 and over reported some sort of leisure or sports activity, such as watching TV, socializing, or exercising. Among this group of participants, men spent more time doing leisure activities (5.7 hours) than women (5.0 hours). Men were slightly more likely than women to participate in sports on any given day, 19 versus 16 percent. In absolute terms, individuals increased their TV watching and socializing times by about the same amount; they watched TV for 42 more minutes and socialized for 35 more minutes on weekend days than on weekdays. Employed adults living in households without children (under age 18) engaged in leisure and sports activities for 4.5 hours, about 50 more minutes per day than employed adults living with a child under age 6. Almost half of their additional leisure time was spent watching TV. Adolescents and adults now spend, on average, more than 64 days a year watching television, 41 days listening to the radio and a little over a week using the Internet. Among adults, 97 million Internet users sought news online last year, 92 million bought a product, 91 million made a travel reservation, 16 million used a social or professional networking site and 13 million created a blog."

So what I've concluded is that alot of people waste alot of time watching TV. And I think we are included in that group. We don't watch TV, per say, but we watch occasional movies on our computer, which is basically the same activity. And we spend alot of time cooking dinner every night and cleaning it up. We usually take a walk or go exercising. The rest of our time is spent just interacting with each other. I'm amazed at how much time we "waste" just BSing, bugging each other, being silly, chit-chatting, etc. I would say that 60% of our off-work time is spent doing that. So pretty much, we do what every other person does. Maybe we should get some hobbies... join a bowling league?

Passive-Aggressive

Passive-aggressive behaviour refers to passive, sometimes obstructionist resistance to authoritative instructions in interpersonal or occupational situations. It can manifest itself as resentment, stubbornness, procrastination, sullenness, or repeated failure to accomplish requested tasks for which one is assumed, often explicitly, to be responsible. It is a defensive posture and, more often than not, only partly conscious. For example, people who are passive-aggressive might take so long to get ready for a party they do not wish to attend, that the party is nearly over by the time they arrive.

Common signs of passive-aggressive personality disorder
There are certain behaviors that help identify passive-aggressive behavior. [3]
Ambiguity
Avoiding responsibility by claiming forgetfulness
Blaming others
Chronic lateness and forgetfulness
Complaining
Does not express hostility or anger openly
Fear of authority
Fear of competition
Fear of dependency
Fear of intimacy
Fosters chaos
Intentional inefficiency
Making excuses and lying
Obstructionism
Procrastination
Resentment
Resists suggestions from others
Sarcasm

We watched a really good french film last night called Les Choristes. We tried watching it in Taiwan one time, on Adena's recommendation, but it was in French with Chinese subtitles. It was along the lines of Mr. Hollands Opus, but more French. I recommend it : )

Thurm and I decided we should buy a house when our lease is up in October. So we've looked around a little, talked to a mortgage broker, etc. So our realtor sent us a listing for this cool old mansion that someone made into a tri-plex. Its a little out of our price range, but its AWESOME! We drove over to it last night and walked around and looked in the windows and fantasized how we'd fix it up.

Tonight we are going to the opera, Lucia di Lasomething. Its in Italian with English ''supertitles." I am excited to see how they have subtitles at the Capitol Theatre. Its so cool that my husband is willing and excited to go to the opera with me : )

Swallowing Tears

I have watched, IN AMAZEMENT, my little niece, Isabell, physically swallow her tears. Her huge eyes will well up in tears, sobs will start coming from her mouth, her face will get all scrunched. Then she'll get threatened by her mom to stop crying or else... some consequence. And amazingly, she can just stop. Stop the tears. Stop the sobs. Her face will suddenly be angelic again. How does she do this?
I've decided this is how marriage has to be. I get my feelings hurt and I dwell on it and dwell on it and can't get over it. Thurm trys to make it better, apologises, hugs and kisses me, and I am still prideful and don't let it go. Why can't I be like Isabell and just GET OVER IT! I am going to try to be more like her.

Saturday morning Thurm & I were being passive-aggressive over hurt feelings and mis-understandings. Mostly it was my fault. By afternoon we had talked it out, kissed, and made up. That night we went to a party of some mutual friends. We were the only married people there, it was made up of mostly LDS-late-twenties-singles. Just a year and a half ago we were in this category... and now we are in the married category. Now, not to minimize the single life, because I had a good time and I'm really glad I had those years to be irresponsible, to travel, to develop tight friendships with people who will always be apart of my life, to blow my money on entertainment and dining out.... but MAN am I SOOOOOO glad to be married!
At some point during the party, Thurm leaned over and said something to the affect of what I just explained above. And I looked around the room of people dancing, I thought about our morning of fighting, and I was just so thankful to have finally found the love of my life. My 27 years of singlehood are full of good memories and fun times, but I would hang out with Thurm on the couch in our tiny apartment talking about nothing, over going to a raging party any day.

The Prom

This is our picture from our company prom. It's really our company party, but since everyone gets REALLY dressed up, its referred to as "the prom." Thurm & I look like we were crying because we were laughing that it took the photographer 4 takes to get both of our eyes open. This was actually a pretty fun party. They had drinks and dinner at the Grand America downtown, very swanky.