Quinn the Cute

Quinn has been adorable lately.  

He has been laughing over everything. When we play peek-a-boo he holds perfectly still till I pull the blanket off and then laughs hysterically. And he will just kiss me without me prompting it. 

He will pick at the carpet, some tiny, itty-bitty object and then try to put it in his mouth.  Thurm & I can't even see what he is picking at. Thurm's comment "I think he's hallucinating."

He has been testing out his voice. Yelping to the top of his lungs just because. Making little sounds that go up and down in tone, sort of sing-songy. Thurm's comment "I think he wants to learn Chinese." (Chinese has four tones to each syllable). 

Its just so exciting watching his little mind figuring things out. You can just look in his eyes and tell he knows what's up.  

Selfishness Masked as Equality

An experience with a stay-at-home mom sparked my thoughts and I wanted to write them out.

So I was a single girl for awhile and considered myself a feminist. However, I think I've refined my thoughts and opinions on the subject. I believe in equality. Equality for the man and the woman and for every race and religion for that matter. 

I have been feeling like feminism has gone overboard lately. I read this quote"What the feminists want is the traditional special protections women had in more paternalistic days plus all the rights that they have gained in the quest for equality with men." We want our cake and to eat it too. 

This is exactly how I look around and see alot of marriages. Let me use an example: Mary stays at home with the kids while John works. Mary says "my job is 24 hours a day, 7 days a week! Yours is just 40 hours a week. You should come home and help with the dishes and kids, etc. I also expect flowers and gifts occasionally, told how beautiful I am, doors opened, etc. But don't treat me like the "little woman," I am as smart and strong as you any day. " Women have this attitude that men owe them something. That we DESERVE pedicures and shopping sprees just because we are a woman.  This attitude has been pounced on by marketers, of course. What better way to sell a product that to say "you deserve it."  

I'm not saying your man shouldn't treat you like that, hopefully he does, but are you treating him the same? I feel like there is this attitude hanging over women that you have to make sure you aren't getting taken advantage of. We are so worried about not being a doormat, that women are forgetting to treat their husband as good as we expect to be treated.  And if you do serve your husband, treat him like a king, its like all the other women in the world will think you are un-doing all the good the women's rights movement has done. 

EQUALITY. My husband treats me like a Queen. Comes home from work and helps make dinner, does dishes, feeds the baby, gives me massages, gets me glasses of water, serves me constantly. I feel like he works hard all day and I should have dinner on the table and a clean house.  Its my way of serving him and showing him I love him.  And maybe I'm not as busy as other moms because I only have one. But I have tons of time during the day to surf the web, read a book, etc. So I don't think its fair that he should have to come home from work and do dishes. Maybe that will change when I have more kids. But if anything, right now, I feel really spoiled. I get to stay at home and be with an adorable baby all day with lots of time to spend how I like. I'm pretty sure Thurm has the raw end of the deal. 

I just think too many marriages fall apart because they are both thinking "this isn't fair! He/she needs to treat ME better.  I DESERVE this. I'm not going to be a doormat! When he treats me better, than I'll treat him better."  

This is the exact opposite attitude that a marriage needs to have to survive. When I was getting married all the old people who had been married 60 years all gave the advice that "you have to give 110% and hope that you get something in return." That's exactly how it works. If you run around yelling "this isn't fair! I give way more than I get" then it's never going to work. If you give 110%, hopefully you'll get it in return eventually. And even if you don't, it's probably the only thing keeping your marriage together. 

Salt Lake Marathon 2009

Thurm and I committed and paid to run the SLC Marathon....well, Thurm is doing the half-marathon and I'm doing the 5k. But still. Thurm hasn't run since last years marathon and I haven't run since...never. So last night we signed up and took our voyage run. Two miles with little Quinn in his awesome BOB running stroller. And when I say run, I mean walking more than half. But it felt good and its nice to have a little motivation. We have about 3 months to get in decent enough shape to not embarrass ourselves. Thurm has more reason to be embarrassed by a slow time because he ran last years marathon and has a reputation to uphold. At least I have being chubby and giving birth SEVEN months ago as an excuse? We saw the "Clydesdale and Athena" division of the race. This is a nicer way of putting the "Fat, obese, and overweight" division. And while maybe we qualify for this division, I was put off by Clydesdale. CLYDESDALE! Athena isn't much better. I won't lower myself. I am an obese person in denial. I make fun of other fat people.

So I have my sister-in-law talked into doing it. Maybe my little bro. Anyone else? A 5k is only three miles! Who's with me!?!?!

Back on the Soap Box

The Business of Being Born- you can watch it for free on netflicks.com

I just watched the best documentary on giving birth in America called "The Business of Being Born." Its everything that I wish I would have known before giving birth. It made so much sense and put into words the thoughts I had while going through my birth experience. Before giving birth I really wanted a drug-free, vaginal birth. Before giving birth, however, every book you read and every doctor preps you for the 1 in 4 chance that you'll have a c-section. This mystified me. How is that number so high when women since the dawn of time have given birth without surgery. The documentary explained all the factors that have made births in America in the 2000 become the way they are. Alot of it is fear based. And I'll admit that I was scared. Scared that if I didn't do what the doctor recommended, I'd hurt my baby.

My vicious cycle began with being induced. Once you are induced the contractions are so hard that almost everyone opts to have an epidural. Then if the baby doesn't come within a certain time frame, c-sections become necessary because the baby is not getting enough oxygen related to all the drugs coursing through your body. (I had a vaginal birth). The oxytocin that they give you is supposed to be like the hormones your own body produces to bring on contractions. However, its missing the "love and protect" hormone that women produce. And I experienced this; that when the baby is born, women are missing that hormone and almost don't want much to do with baby. However, women that go drug-free are filled with the "love and protect" hormone and instantly bond with their baby. Another part of giving birth naturally is that you are free to walk about, stand, etc. to help the birthing process along. The worst way to give birth is laying down because of the angle of the pelvis. I asked for a "walking epidural" so that I could stand and let gravity help, but they didn't even have them at my hospital.
Women that I talked to before said "get the drugs, a book, take a nap, and wait for the baby to arrive. Which is basically what ended up happening. I was so out of it that I really don't remember much of the first day of Quinn's life. Women kept asking me "why go natural when you can go pain-free?" And after the first hour of pitocen induced contractions I convinced myself of the same thing. In the moment of all that pain, I couldn't remember why I wanted to go natural in the first place. I wanted to go natural so I would be coherent for it all, so that my baby wouldn't come into the world hopped up on drugs, so that I could pass through that womanly right of passage, and a few other reasons. I didn't have the experience that I wanted to and I blame my own naivety. I wish that I would have watched this documentary before. In the hospital, you trust that the information you are given is full and in your best interest. But its not. I don't think most women in America know what their options are.
Basically the documentary shows the benefits of using a mid-wife, having home births, water births, etc. It also shows the manipulations of insurance companies. Midwives are cheaper, safer, better for mother and baby, less deaths, etc. There were some statistics that I can't remember that basically said Europe has it figured out and America is stupid. It comes down to not being educated and just following the status quo.
I might have some facts wrong, so you should probably just watch it for yourself. I'm sure my doctor brother is rolling his eyes at his hippie sister, but I encourage you all to watch it : )

Little Quinn and I after his first haircut. I've been trying to convince Thurm to let me cut it since Quinn was a couple months old. He was born with really long hair. Thurm finally gave his blessing.

This face cracks me up. Hahaha. I had just switched his food from yams to peas. He looks like he's going to be sick.

Charity

I found the antidote to my bad habit of being critical! Now if I can just remember this everyday. I found this talk today and it was a spin on charity that I'd never thought of before.


Marvin J. Ashton, “The Tongue Can Be a Sharp Sword,” Ensign, May 1992, 18

When King David was pleading for mercy in the fifty-seventh Psalm, he cried: “My soul is among lions: and I lie even among them that are set on fire, even the sons of men, whose teeth are spears and arrows, and their tongue a sharp sword.” (Ps. 57:4.)

In the world today we are victims of many who use their tongues as sharp swords. The misuse of our tongues seems to add intrigue and destruction as the media and private persons indulge in this pastime. In the vernacular of the day, this destructive activity is called bashing. The dictionary reports that to bash is to strike with a heavy, crushing blow.

Such a popular behavior is indulged in by far too many who bash a neighbor, a family member, a public servant, a community, a country, a church. It is alarming also how often we find children bashing parents and parents bashing children.

We as members of the Church need to be reminded that the words “Nay, speak no ill” are more than a phrase in a musical context but a recommended way of life. (See Hymns, no. 233.) We need to be reminded more than ever before that “if there is anything virtuous, lovely, or of good report or praiseworthy, we seek after these things.” (A of F 1:13.) If we follow that admonition, there is no time for the dastardly hobby of bashing instead of building.

Some think the only way to get even, to get attention or advantage, or to win is to bash people. This kind of behavior is never appropriate. Oftentimes character and reputation and almost always self-esteem are destroyed under the hammer of this vicious practice.

How far adrift we have allowed ourselves to go from the simple teaching “If you can’t say something good about someone or something, don’t say anything” to where we now too often find ourselves involved in the bash business.

Even though reports and rumors pertaining to misconduct and misbehavior are readily available and can make good ammunition for those who would injure, bash, or damage, the Savior reminds us that he who is without sin may cast the first stone. (See John 8:7.) Ugly reports and conversations are always available to those who would promote the sordid and sensational. None of us are yet perfect. We each have failings that aren’t terribly difficult to detect—especially if that is the aim. Through microscopic examination one can find in almost every life incidents or traits that can be destructive when they are magnified.

We need to get back to basic principles of recognizing the good and the praiseworthy within the family. Home evening needs to be reemphasized and used as a tool or foundation for wholesome communication and teaching, but never as an opportunity to bash other family members, neighbors, teachers, or Church leaders. Family loyalty will emerge when we reinforce the good and the positive and bridle our negative thoughts as we seek after those things that are of good report.

There will always be those in the days ahead who will be inclined to bash ourselves and others, but we cannot allow a heavy, crushing blow to destroy us or to deter our personal or church progress.

Bernard Baruch, an adviser to six United States presidents, was once asked whether he was ever disturbed by attacks from enemies. He said, “No man can humiliate or disturb me. I won’t let him.”

We are reminded that Jesus Christ, the only perfect person to ever walk the earth, taught us through quiet example to say nothing or to be silent in stressful times in our lives rather than to spend time and energy bashing for whatever purpose.

So what is the antidote for this bashing that hurts feelings, demeans others, destroys relationships, and harms self-esteem? Bashing should be replaced with charity. Moroni described it this way:

“Wherefore, my beloved brethren, if ye have not charity, ye are nothing, for charity never faileth. Wherefore, cleave unto charity, which is the greatest of all. …“Charity is the pure love of Christ, and it endureth forever.” (Moro. 7:46–47.)

Charity is, perhaps, in many ways a misunderstood word. We often equate charity with visiting the sick, taking in casseroles to those in need, or sharing our excess with those who are less fortunate. But really, true charity is much, much more.

Real charity is not something you give away; it is something that you acquire and make a part of yourself. And when the virtue of charity becomes implanted in your heart, you are never the same again. It makes the thought of being a basher repulsive.

Perhaps the greatest charity comes when we are kind to each other, when we don’t judge or categorize someone else, when we simply give each other the benefit of the doubt or remain quiet. Charity is accepting someone’s differences, weaknesses, and shortcomings; having patience with someone who has let us down; or resisting the impulse to become offended when someone doesn’t handle something the way we might have hoped. Charity is refusing to take advantage of another’s weakness and being willing to forgive someone who has hurt us. Charity is expecting the best of each other.

None of us need one more person bashing or pointing out where we have failed or fallen short. Most of us are already well aware of the areas in which we are weak. What each of us does need is family, friends, employers, and brothers and sisters who support us, who have the patience to teach us, who believe in us, and who believe we’re trying to do the best we can, in spite of our weaknesses. What ever happened to giving each other the benefit of the doubt? What ever happened to hoping that another person would succeed or achieve? What ever happened to rooting for each other?

It should come as no surprise that one of the adversary’s tactics in the latter days is stirring up hatred among the children of men. He loves to see us criticize each other, make fun or take advantage of our neighbor’s known flaws, and generally pick on each other. The Book of Mormon is clear from where all anger, malice, greed, and hate come.

Nephi prophesied that in the last days the devil would “rage in the hearts of the children of men, and stir them up to anger against that which is good.” (2 Ne. 28:20.) By the looks of what we constantly see depicted in the news media, it appears that Satan is doing a pretty good job. In the name of reporting the news, we are besieged with sometimes graphic depictions—too often in living color—of greed, extortion, violent sexual crimes, and insults between business, athletic, or political opponents.

Throughout the scriptures a common thread seems to emerge. Let’s consider first the Sermon on the Mount, which to our knowledge was the first sermon Jesus Christ taught his newly called disciples. The overriding theme of the Savior’s sermon, which in many ways is the ultimate handbook on coming unto Him, seems to center around the virtues of love, compassion, forgiveness, and long-suffering—in other words, those qualities that enable us to deal with our fellowmen more compassionately. Let’s look specifically at the Savior’s message to the Twelve. They (and we) were admonished to “be reconciled to [our] brother” (Matt. 5:24), to “agree with [our] adversary quickly” (Matt. 5:25), to “love [our] enemies, [to] bless them that curse [us], [to] do good to them that hate [us], and [to] pray for them which despitefully use [us], and persecute [us].” (Matt. 5:44.) We are told, “Whosoever shall smite thee on thy right cheek, turn to him the other also.” (Matt. 5:39.)

It seems interesting that the first principles the Lord Jesus Christ chose to teach His newly called Apostles were those that center around the way we treat each other. And then, what did He emphasize during the brief period He spent with the Nephites on this continent? Basically the same message. Could this be because the way we treat each other is the foundation of the gospel of Jesus Christ?

During an informal fireside address held with a group of adult Latter-day Saints, the leader directing the discussion invited participation by asking the question: “How can you tell if someone is converted to Jesus Christ?” For forty-five minutes those in attendance made numerous suggestions in response to this question, and the leader carefully wrote down each answer on a large blackboard. All of the comments were thoughtful and appropriate. But after a time, this great teacher erased everything he had written. Then, acknowledging that all of the comments had been worthwhile and appreciated, he taught a vital principle: “The best and most clear indicator that we are progressing spiritually and coming unto Christ is the way we treat other people.”Would you consider this idea for a moment—that the way we treat the members of our families, our friends, those with whom we work each day is as important as are some of the more noticeable gospel principles we sometimes emphasize.

Last month the Relief Society celebrated its 150th anniversary. Its motto, “Charity Never Faileth,” has been a way of life for its members and others around the globe.

Imagine what could happen in today’s world—or in our own wards, or families, or priesthood quorums and auxiliaries—if each of us would vow to cherish, watch over, and comfort one another. Imagine the possibilities!

One young woman, serving in a stake Relief Society presidency and at the time also laboring under the pressure of an especially challenging project, lost her temper one morning during a presidency meeting. The cause of her unhappiness had little to do with the question at hand and was related more to the fact that at the time she was laboring under intense home pressure on a major task and was feeling frustrated and frazzled. Afterward, she was embarrassed at her behavior and immediately called to apologize for her outburst. Her friends in the presidency were generous and told her not to think another thing about it. Still she wondered if they might think less of her, now that they’d seen her at less than her best. But that evening the doorbell rang around dinnertime, and there stood the other members of the presidency with dinner in hand. “We knew when you lost your cool this morning that you must just be worn out. We thought a little supper might help. We want you to know we love you.” The young woman was amazed. In spite of her outburst that morning, her friends were there to offer support rather than criticism. Rather than seize the opportunity to bash her, they were filled with the spirit of charity.

Be one who nurtures and who builds. Be one who has an understanding and a forgiving heart, who looks for the best in people. Leave people better than you found them. Be fair with your competitors, whether in business, athletics, or elsewhere. Don’t get drawn into some of the parlance of our day and try to “win” by intimidation or by undermining someone’s character. Lend a hand to those who are frightened, lonely, or burdened.

If we could look into each other’s hearts and understand the unique challenges each of us faces, I think we would treat each other much more gently, with more love, patience, tolerance, and care.

If the adversary can influence us to pick on each other, to find fault, bash, and undermine, to judge or humiliate or taunt, half his battle is won. Why? Because though this sort of conduct may not equate with succumbing to grievous sin, it nevertheless neutralizes us spiritually. The Spirit of the Lord cannot dwell where there is bickering, judging, contention, or any kind of bashing.

Even in biblical times James warned us of the necessity to govern our tongues:

“Even so the tongue is a little member, and boasteth great things. Behold, how great a matter a little fire kindleth!

“And the tongue is a fire, a world of iniquity: so is the tongue among our members, that it defileth the whole body, and setteth on fire the course of nature; and it is set on fire of hell.” (James 3:5–6.)

Once again may I emphasize the principle that when we truly become converted to Jesus Christ, committed to Him, an interesting thing happens: our attention turns to the welfare of our fellowman, and the way we treat others becomes increasingly filled with patience, kindness, a gentle acceptance, and a desire to play a positive role in their lives. This is the beginning of true conversion.

Let us open our arms to each other, accept each other for who we are, assume everyone is doing the best he or she can, and look for ways to help leave quiet messages of love and encouragement instead of being destructive with bashing.

Again James reminds us, “The fruit of righteousness is sown in peace of them that make peace.” (James 3:18.)

May God help us individually and collectively to know and teach that bashing should be replaced with charity today and always, I pray in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

blessing 5

Tithing.
For those unfamiliar with the LDS religion, we pay 10% of income as tithing to the Lord. This goes to help build churches and temples, operating funds for wards and stakes, help the missionaries, etc. "Seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you” (Matthew 6:33).
Its a way for me to show Heavenly Father that I'm grateful for all the blessings he gives me.
Thurm and I just recently paid our tithing. We stuck the 10% in a savings account all year and paid it in one lump sum. I have to admit that it was a little hard writing that huge check and handing it over. But I can't tell you how blessed we have been from paying our tithing. Money has been tight, especially since Thurm has been so wonderful about being the sole provider and encouraging me to stay at home with Quinn. But we have somehow always had enough for everything we need and want. In the last two months we have gotten two unexpected checks for $100 each. I know that its because we pay tithing, Heavenly Father makes sure it all works out for us.

Thurm and I just attended the most AWKWARD social event. There was a 20 minute pause while the judges were deciding the winner of a competition. While the judges were out the MC's had to kill time, but it was WAY more time than they expected. So they used about 5 minutes BSing with the audience and talking about how awkward the silence was and trying to come up with jokes to tell. That alone was horrible to watch. But it went awry when they opened it up to the audience. "Can anyone sing or dance for us?" chirp, chirp. When to our delight, a German middle-aged woman came up to the stage and said "I whistle any song for you. You tell me a song, I whistle it." Someone yelled out what the rest of the open-mouth audience was thinking "Is this for real?" The woman said "I start off with this one, I whistle it to my bird every night." Then she whistled. Not very good. Turns out she had stage fright. Then some teenage boys mocked her and she got offended and huffed off the stage.
Next, a woman offered her piano skills and played "Hey Mickey" as in "Hey Mickey, your so fine, your so fine you blow my mind, hey Mickey." The MC's mumbled and fumbled their way through that as we all cringed.
Here's the climax. A bald, scrawny teacher from the NV side came up and decided to take over. " You know what we need? I think we need a little bit of improv." Nothing I could type would give this five minutes of him trying to entertain the audience justice. But it was one of those moments that EVERYONE is thinking "how do we get rid of this guy?" His vibrato was embarrassing. Meanwhile, they decide to introduce some high school boys that were stage hands. Never give a high school boy a microphone. One of them meowed into it. So picture bald, scrawny dude and six high school boys competing for attention on stage all the while "Hey Mickey" piano lady was bustling around the stage with the MC's trying to come up with material for the audience.

I wish I could have recorded and put it on YouTube. It would have been a cult classic.

How did they let it get to that point? Just have an intermission and let people go to the bathroom!!!

Rosemary Bread

This bread is DELICIOUS! Think along the lines of the bread Macaroni Grill serves.

1 c warm water
1 1/2 tsp dry yeast

Combine and let froth.
Add the rest of the ingredients and mix.

3 TBS olive oil
1 1/2 tsp sugar
1 1/2 tsp salt
1/4 tsp Italian seasoning
1/4 tsp ground black pepper
1 TBS dried rosemary
2 1/2 c flour

Let rise 1 hour or doubled. Punch down, form loaf, let rise again 1 hour. Bake @ 375 for 30 mins. Awesome dipped in olive oil or balsamic vinegar.

"No pictures please"

"Eh? Speak into my good ear."


Thurm & Ben's HUGE snowman

Gamin' Fools!

Merry Christmas

Quinn was a little curious as to why we kept trying to get him to rip paper.

blessing 4

HOME. Though we live in a little two bedroom apartment, where not everything works and the carpets sick me out, we are glad to be home again. We spent a little over two weeks with our families. It was so nice to be with family and eat and eat and eat. We played games, did crafts, ate, played lazer tag, watched movies, and ate. We had free babysitters and we took advantage to run errands and go on dates as much as we could. But there is something about being in our own space and on our own schedule that is very nice.

blessing 3

My family. My adorable niece, Elise, came and stayed with us the week before Christmas. She is SUPER babysitter. She is the girl you'd want to watch your kids. She is so great and Quinn loved her. She was also a huge helper... cleaned my shower, did dishes, etc. She is the niece everyone loves to come visit and help with the kids.
This Christmas we have been able to spend two weeks with our families. We spent the first half with Thurm's family. They are always so fun to spend time with. They are gaming FANATICS. They will put off dinner, leave the house in disarray, ignore phone calls, if there is a game going on. Games and having fun are first priority, so its always a good time at their house.
This week we are with my family. And while we are a grumpy lot, I always love being at home. There is no one I'd rather argue with than my brothers. The chaos of holidays at my parents is always fun (for a few days) and there is no where I'd rather be.
So, my family, those of you who read, I love you and am so thankful for you all.

More pics, click here

Cute Family Photos

For more family photos click here

blessing two

The Gospel of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. I'm so glad to have a guideline to live my life. I love how the church is all about family and love and service. It's basically just trying to be like Jesus everyday of my life. Having faith and believing in Christ is really the reason I am a happy person. It really is too bad not everyone has this anchor in their life. I've been so blessed by living a righteous life and following the teachings of Jesus.